"How Can You Have Too Many Children? That's Like Saying You Have Too Many Flowers" ~ Mother Teresa

A Peek Into Our Hectic, Crazy & Loving Family of Eleven


Saturday, December 19, 2009

The Good. The Bad. & The Ugly.

The Good. The girls are gaining weight well. Rosalie is up to 4#10oz, Gwendolen is up to 5#1oz, and Emilia is up to 6#. We no longer have to write down every ounce they consume. It is so much nicer. Rosalie is starting to look less like a cross between a Naked Mole Rat (according to her brother) and E.T and look more like a newborn baby. Mia is still a whole pound lighter than our lightest baby, yet compared to her sisters, she looks just huge.

The Bad. I'm still not exclusively breastfeeding. I'm still pumping. ALL.THE.DAMN.TIME. As a matter of fact, this stupid pump sees more action than my poor husband. I hate this pump. I want to love it since it does help for me to provide milk for the girls but I don't. I don't want to have to use it. I want the girls to not need me to use it, yet they do. It's so very frustrating. I truly didn't think it would be this hard. To breastfeed. I mean, that's what the boobs are there for, and I can't do it.

The Ugly. The thoughts that are going on in my crazy, post partum sleep deprived head. Bottle Feeding. Only. Pumping for as long as I can, and hoping for the best. That is UGLY. I mean no offense to those that chose to bottle feed, formula feed, whatever. It's just not for me. Human milk is meant for human babies. It's just how I feel. I think it would kill me to not be able to breastfeed these girls solely from my breasts, yet how I am going to get from point A to point B is still unanswered to me.


  1. You are a rockstar. I am so proud of you for giving those girls the best you can! Pumping sucks, no ifs ands or buts about it. Hang in there! One day they will get it and you can kiss the pump goodbye!

  2. Oh Sweetie, this is the STORY of my life right now. I will tell you a couple things that I hope help:
    -pumping DOES suck and I do it 7x a day, still, at 8 weeks, but I pump less and they eat more.
    -they are starting to get full feeds more often, and preferring to nurse than the bottle.
    -from what I have heard and read and what my LLL friends tell me, it can be a good 3-4 months before they get all their feeds from the breast.
    -I think about quitting and how hard it is all the time. You are not alone! We can really support each other and I want you to know that I get how HARD it is and you are kicking butt. What an awesome mommy you are.


  3. Just a post of encouragement for you. Big applause on what you've managed to accomplish so far and sending strength for what you want to do.

  4. Pumping does suck. That is all there is to it. But it is so worth it. My son was born with a cleft pallet and was unable to breastfeed. Pumping was the only way to get the milk to him. I also had to pump part time with my older girls since I work Full time. we had issues with nipple confusion with my oldest DD until we switched to a breastfeeding friendly bottle and kept it on slow flow so she had to work just as much at the bottle as she did at the breast. Keep your chin up it takes time but it will get better. :)