Thinking Alot...

or maybe it's just hormones. (There are an awful lot swimming around in my body right now) But all I know is that I'm feeling pretty alone in all this. I would like to make a few things clear. First off. Aaron and I didn't "plan" to have triplets. It's just not possible. It's not as if we said "Hey! Let's have sex three times tonight and see if we can get three babies!" It doesn't work that way. God forbid, if it did, alot more people would have multiples.

Secondly, babies are a GOOD thing. Sure, sometimes they don't necessary follow all the plans we have in life, whether it be ours, our kids, our sisters, brothers, uncles, aunts WHATEVER. Does it really matter? Do you ever think that Aaron or I look at ANY of our kids and say "Damn, why did we have you?" GOD NO! Granted, we have a few kids that have caught us off guard but does that change our love for them or our desire to make sure that they have the best lives possible? Nope. Not that either.

Third, where does it say that because we have nine children will that make our kids any less fortunate than the kid down the street that has just two siblings? Nowhere that I've been able to see. It sure does swim around in alot of peoples minds though. Granted, we won't be going to Hawaii or Europe or Australia anytime soon with nine kids, but now they have something to strive for when they grow up. And they will have 8 of the best friends that any child could ever ask for. I don't know what I would do without my sisters and brother and if I happened to have had 4 more? As an adult, that would be amazing. As a child, I'm sure its trying and yes they do have their arguments that make me nuts, but I KNOW for a fact that my kids love each other, respect each other and are beyond excited about these babies.

Fourth, Yes, life is going to be HARD. VERY HARD for the next few years. Interesting even. I still wouldn't change a single decision I've made. I'm almost certain Aaron feels the same way.

Fifth, this is a HIGH RISK PREGNANCY. I'm not sure everyone realizes that. It's not necessarily safe to be carrying 3 babies at once. There are alot of dangers to me and the babies. Now that we have reached 13 weeks, the fear of miscarriage is over. Now I have to make sure I don't go into premature labor. My history is great. I've never had any signs of premature labor with any of the other kids. That is HUGE in this situation. But I do need to be careful. There is possibility of bedrest. In home or hospital. Again, this is not a CHOICE we've made. Yes, it will complicate our lives but I will do anything I have to do to get these babies here safely. The list of potential complications is long. PROM (water breaking early) hypertension, premature labor, preeclampsia, and the list goes on. I tend to avoid ALL of these and carry these babies to 36 weeks and get them to 5# each. That is my goal. It would be so much easier with the positive love and support of our family.

Now, God has given us the job of growing these babies and bringing them safely into the world. The way I see it, He's done it twice now. I'm pretty sure he's trying to tell us something. This is something that we are supposed to do. It sure would be a whole lot easier if we didn't feel so alone in all this. These are our BABIES. They were given to us for a reason. We want to make sure they get here safely so that we can see what plans God had in mind when he chose us to be their parents. We know they are going to be something spectacular in this world. We can't wait to meet them and watch them grow. We hope that soon everyone will feel the same as we do.